startaurus, you're hardly the one to be giving advice about culture if your posts on the tzaziki thread (http://vegweb.com/index.php?topic=4687.0) are anything to go by.

I don't know how widespread it is, but my friend was in a program teaching English in Okinawa, and he said that people there were very open with their comments.  The way he saw it, to them, they were simply pointing out differences, whichthey didn't see as a bad thing.  For example, he has a large nose (for an American, much less in Asia!).  He said while he was there, every new person he met asked how his nose got so big.  I don't know if that "comment acceptability" would apply to something like weight, also. 

What kind of question is that? Were they expecting an answer? Like, "I eat a lot of carrots, they make your nose grow, didn't you know that?" Or " I pull on it ten times every night before I go to bed"

I don't think they are necessarily looking for an actual answer. It's just a way of interracting for them, and it's normal & acceptable in their own culture. They might also just be phrasing it differently than we would... For instance, perhaps they say, "How did your nose get so big?" when Americans would say, "Your nose looks so different from ours!" It's not a negative comment, nor is it really a compliment; it's just taking notice of a feature.

When discussing things like this, we have to remember cultural relativism. I don't think it's fair to judge the actions of another person (of an entirely different culture) against the way we do things... Of course there are larger topics, such as human rights violations, etc., that should probably be more universally agreed upon. I would never say that torture (for instance) is okay because it's part of a country's culture... But with small subtleties like this ("How did your nose get so big?"), it's what makes everyone unique & interesting.

I don't know how widespread it is, but my friend was in a program teaching English in Okinawa, and he said that people there were very open with their comments.  The way he saw it, to them, they were simply pointing out differences, whichthey didn't see as a bad thing.  For example, he has a large nose (for an American, much less in Asia!).  He said while he was there, every new person he met asked how his nose got so big.  I don't know if that "comment acceptability" would apply to something like weight, also. 

What kind of question is that? Were they expecting an answer? Like, "I eat a lot of carrots, they make your nose grow, didn't you know that?" Or " I pull on it ten times every night before I go to bed"

I don't think they are necessarily looking for an actual answer. It's just a way of interracting for them, and it's normal & acceptable in their own culture. They might also just be phrasing it differently than we would... For instance, perhaps they say, "How did your nose get so big?" when Americans would say, "Your nose looks so different from ours!" It's not a negative comment, nor is it really a compliment; it's just taking notice of a feature.

When discussing things like this, we have to remember cultural relativism. I don't think it's fair to judge the actions of another person (of an entirely different culture) against the way we do things... Of course there are larger topics, such as human rights violations, etc., that should probably be more universally agreed upon. I would never say that torture (for instance) is okay because it's part of a country's culture... But with small subtleties like this ("How did your nose get so big?"), it's what makes everyone unique & interesting.

Exactly JessaCita.  This was basically the same thing my friend told me.  He said that in Okinawa it is not considered rude to notice differences, especially in a place that is so homogeneous (my friend was the only white person in his village).  The weren't saying "Damn, your big nose it ugly!"  Only curious because his features were so much different than theirs. 

But if one culture thinks of it as bad manners one should listen as well.

He put himself in THEIR culture.  They should not change their visions of etiquette.  When you go to another country, it is proper to respect THEIR customs.  When they come to your country, they need to respect YOURS.

That's not etiquette. That's not etiquette to make someone feel bad. And that doesn't deserve respect. There's other stuff in a culture oh yeah but something like that NO WAY.

How do you judge which customs deserve respect?  Are you the final authority?

Well, yeah.  Haven't you noticed?

Don't forget twenty smilies, Shaolin.

And you'll do well to mention the CIA factbook.

Don't forget twenty smilies, Shaolin.

Oops! How could I be so negligent in my practice! It must be all this rigorous studying that has left me absentminded...I will redeem myself...

  ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

(FYI: Twenty smilies is insufficient...there must be at least thirty smilies displayed if you are truly following The Way of Startaurus.)

Don't forget twenty smilies, Shaolin.

Oops! How could I be so negligent in my practice! It must be all this rigorous studying that has left me absentminded...I will redeem myself...

  ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

(FYI: Twenty smilies is insufficient...there must be at least thirty smilies displayed if you are truly following The Way of Startaurus.)

It's very rude of you to tell me how to use the smilies.

But, Shaolin, the CIA factbook says that twenty smilies does the trick.

lol!! ya'll are aweosme... but i thought odd numbers caught more attention? so maybe its hould be 21? or 19? or 17? or 23?....* list goes on and on*